One to Three Years Before Event

Decide if you want a party planner and set up initial meeting
Secure videographer/photographer
Investigate and choose location and date
Choose entertainment, theme and color scheme
Contact synagogue or temple when your child is under 10 years old to learn about the process
Lessons usually begin one year before the bar mitzvah date
Help your child decide on a community service project

Eleven Months Before Event

Contact hotels to request a block of rooms for out of town guests
Meet with party planner to begin design elements

Ten Months Before Event

Bring the Bar/Bat Mitzvah child to meet with the planner to give input on decorations

Nine Months Before Event

Make any transportation arrangements needed

Eight Months Before Event

Create guest list
Begin choosing invitations, wording and calligraphy style
Decide if you would like to make arrangements to transport the kids to and from the ceremony and party

Six Months Before Event

Develop a guest list with current addresses
Select and order invitations, thank you notes, direction cards, napkins and guest towels depending on your needs
Decide on centerpieces and choose party favors
Arrange accommodations for out of town guests
Decide if you will be hosting other activities for out of towners the weekend of the bar/bat mitzvah
Begin planning menu
Order informal photographs
Begin looking for the family’s attire for the services and for the party

Four Months Before Event

Have invitation weighed at post office and select and purchase postage stamps

Three Months Before Event

Make valet arrangements
Finalize menu, flowers and other details of the party
Order personalized yarmulkes
Make appointments with barber/hair stylist, manicurist
Take invitations to calligrapher
Decide on imprinted accessories and/or give-a-ways

Two Months Before Event

Create candle-lighting ceremony
Develop a timeline for the formalities for the day of the event including the caterer and entertainers, special dances (hora) and food service to make sure that everyone is coordinated
Encourage your child to practice his/her service out loud

Six Weeks Before Event

Mail invitations numbering the back of the response cards to ensure accuracy

One Month Before Event

Reconfirm all service providers
Schedule a rehearsal time at the synagogue
Arrange transportation for out of town guests to and from airports
Arrange floor plan and seating
Arrange hospitality baskets for out of towners including a schedule of events and directions
Final fittings for attire for the entire family

Three Weeks Before Event

Finalize music choices and special songs such as special dances, horas etc.
Call guests who haven’t responded yet

Two Weeks Before Event

Order necessary kosher dinners
Assign tables/prepare seating cards
Reconfirm arrangements with all vendors including photographer, videographer, balloon company/florist etc.
Check accommodations for out of town guests

One Week Before Event

Confirm final guest count with caterer
Adjust seating if necessary
Pack an emergency kit with sewing materials, extra makeup, hairbrushes, pantyhose etc.
Prepare payments for vendors

Two Days Before Event

Deliver gift bags for out of towners to hotel

Day Before Event

Manicure Appointment for mother of Bar/Bat Mitzvah child

Day Of Event

Review timeline to make sure everything is on track

Never miss a story.
Sign up for our newsletter.
Email Address


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here